Fat Women: Stay Home!
Posted in World News on August 7th, 2008
Every weekend, millions of dumpy, 20-something sluts decide not to go to a nightclub because they’re an eyesore to men and an embarrassment to their species. Thank you ladies for doing that. You cows may be good for nothing, but at least you have the decency to be fat-fuck slobs in the privacy of your own homes.
Unfortunately, thousands of these behemoths opt to cover themselves in a sequin tarp and head out anyway. Thankfully for us, they get turned away at the door. Anyplace that sets their drink prices at 15 dollars a pop should provide an atmosphere free of muffin tops, front cracks, and desperate whales. Trust me, you haven’t seen real desperation until you’ve been hit on by a drunk fat girl. A more pathetic spectacle of self-loathing, denial, and tears, I have not seen matched.
All this happens every weekend and up until today, no one has ever given a fuck. This weekend, however, some size 16 womanatee by the name of Georgina Mason decided to call the police about it.
Someone should have called the police on her fat ass — for fifty counts of negligent bonercide. [Read more]
