Yesterday, I was sent this email by a dumb bitch who I will refer to as “Winona” — because that’s her name.

From: Empress Winona
Subject: I’m going to sue you

Someone has posted my number on your site. I have since gotten death threats by phone mentioning your website. We have recorded the call, found the owner of the phone and intend to prosecute.

Remove my number from you website. We plan to see you in court as well for allowing women’s personally information posted, violating their privacy and security rights.

Not an intelligent practice if you want to avoid prison.

The authorities have already recorded the information listed on your site and it will be presented it court. The longer you allow the content to remain, the more damage it does to you and your “movement”.

Remove my number from your site now.

That is the entire email. At the time it was sent, I was on the Toucher and Rich show in Boston 104.1 FM explaining to some broad why it’s not men’s responsibility to make fat women feel good about themselves. It’s actually men’s responsibility to make fat women feel bad about themselves. That’s called a big fat incentive to lose your big fat ass.

Attention she-pigs: the easiest way to end your shame and misery is to hit the treadmill.

I knew the dozy bitch was as fat as a house because only fat women give a shit about fat woman problems. The rest of the world doesn’t care. And why should it? Fat women are useless.

Naturally, her response was, “well, men are fat too!” I know you are, but what am I. A classic defense. If arguing with women was chess, that would be the only move in the book.

The above email is how women solve problems. If something exists that a woman doesn’t like, she gets nice and pissed off about it and then runs straight to the highest authority figure she can find. Until she gets married or her ovaries go bad, this figure goes by the name of “Daddy”. And once women find him, they don’t stop bitching until your life is ruined.

Does Cindy Sheehan ring a bell?

Are you unknowingly disturbing your female neighbor with some late night rocking? Or are you just so good in bed that even when you try not to set your lady off like an air-raid siren, she just gets worse? Trust me, I know what you’re going through. Trust me.

Trust me.

Well if your neighbor is a woman, don’t expect her to knock on your door the next day with a polite and civil request. Don’t expect her to put a Post-It note on your mailbox that says, “Hey, can you do me a favor and keep it down? I don’t know if you’re aware of it, but your late night sexcapades are a nuisance. And since I’m not sure you’re even aware of it, I’m not going to be a total cunt about it.”

That’s called “responding appropriately”. What you should expect from a woman is the exact opposite.

How Women Deal With Problems
1. Shame
2. Blame
3. Maim

Shame

Women are desperately afraid of confrontation and they refuse to admit it. The world is built on confrontation and if you got stuck with a vagina instead of ass-busting fists and a brain that invented the wheel, you got fucked.

Blame

When faced with confrontation, no matter how small and civil it might be, women blame you for not reading their minds and thereby “forcing” them into a position that requires action. Women are used to opening their legs to get what they want, not their mouths. The fastest way to shut a woman up is by needing her to say something. Just ask the overwhelming majority of children who are sexually and physically abused by the men their single mothers bring into their lives.

Maim

Call the cops because someone posted your phone number to an undisclosed page on the internet? To a woman, that sounds reasonable. Start immediately threatening legal and criminal action instead of working out the problem? That’s the only recourse when you expect everyone to read your mind. It’s actually a compromise for what a woman really wants to do — which is cut your dick off. The problem with women is that no one can read their minds because their minds are written with shit on shit.

In other words, women are shit heads.

Women are also shit projectors. They assume everyone is out to screw them because they themselves are out to screw everyone. That’s what happens when you have a vagina and no skills. You have to screw to get by. Men assume everyone is doing their best because that’s what we men always do: our best at all times and we’re perfect in every way. We men project that intent onto everyone else. That’s why we tell people when they’re fucking up; people like fat women! We assume they don’t know any better because why would anyone fuck up on purpose?

Why would fat women be fat on purpose? They must not know it’s disgusting.

Manclusion

Women solve problems by telling everyone about the problem except the one person who could have easily solved it: you.

The cops cannot remove shit from my website. Attorneys cannot remove shit from my website. Google cannot remove shit from my website. WordPress cannot remove shit from my website. Amazon.com, Simon & Schuster, YouTube, and Barnes & Noble cannot remove shit from my website. So quit threatening to tell them. If you’ve got a problem with something, email me and wait patiently for a response. If you’re a woman, include a picture of your tits because I’ve got better things to do with my time than talk to fat broads.

Hot girls and fat girls are different species. If you have enough money, you can fuck fat girls without a condom. You’re too rich to biologically reproduce with one.

Below is my email response to Empress Winona.

It would help if you gave me a URL, sugar tits. Or should I just punch “Winona’s phone number” into the Google and see what comes up?

-Dick

I did exactly that as a laugh and guess what I fucking found.

Her phone number.

On her professional dominatrix escort profile.

Meet Empress Winona.

She does not accept credit cards.

When a whore is too ugly to be a stripper and too lazy to be a prostitute, she becomes a dominatrix. This has been true since the beginning of time.

If you want to be part of my class-action counter suit alleging Empress Winona of negligent bonercide for horrifying the world with the above pictures, comment below.

This entry was posted under Anecdotal Evidence.