Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

Like every other saying there is about women being great or having any skills that don’t involve wanton promiscuity, the above is complete horseshit. It’s like this. Remember when everyone was always talking about how great Krispy Kreme doughnuts were. You couldn’t make it from your car to your desk without hearing about how they melt in your mouth or the exact amount of time to microwave them before the Great Gorging — I don’t know what the analogous scenario is for women. It’s probably they couldn’t make it through an entire Oprah commercial block, while sitting on their fat asses at home, without actually downing doughnuts by the handful or at least without thinking of bathing in the doughy goodness. Who cares.

The point is that the doughnuts are good, sure, but they’re just doughnuts. Just like women and scorn. A woman may get pretty pissed off, but what can she do? She’s just a woman. [Read more]

Women love shopping as much as men love not shopping. You can tell because everything in the world of wares caters to a woman’s sensibilities. Walk into a department store and see for yourself. Do you see any signs anywhere? Do you see a giant neon sign that says: “Bathrooms Are Right the Fuck HERE!”? There’s also no alcohol and I guarantee you don’t know where the fucking door is. That’s because women hate that manner of shit.

The whole process of shopping is supposed to leave you drained, late, and (most importantly) feeling like you’ve accomplished something noble and epic when in fact all you did was go return some shitty presents that your girlfriend or wife (or both) gave you. [Read more]

Men are better than women at procuring loans. Bank loans, personal loans, whatever you want. Think of this situation.

A man approaches either you or a bank and asks for 10,000 dollars or pounds sterling to start a computer repair store or a restaurant.

“Sounds interesting.” You might say. “Tell me more.”

You’ll probably get an interesting answer. Now picture this scenario. A woman approaches you and says you should give her the same amount to start a bead store or a stationary store or some fucking online shit that sells crappy, hand-made jewelry to shut-ins with seven cats. Whatever it is I have a pretty good idea of what either you as a man or you as a bank as a bank would say:

“Fuck you, bitch. That’s the craziest shit I’ve ever heard.” [Read more]

I was recently watching some television (where a properly inspired man can learn just about anything he wants) and I learned some alarming statistics.

70% of women have never had an orgasm during sex.

That’s interesting, I thought. I would have guessed it was way lower than that because really who gives a shit? You can’t squeeze blood from a rock. Then my suspicions of data tampering were confirmed.

85% of men do not enjoy performing oral sex.

Horseshit. The correct percentage is 100. [Read more]

Men are better at using a phone than women. Unlike popular myth says.

Want to know how bad women are at using the phone?

Women using a telephone is like dropping a human invention off on an alien planet. Like a Frisbee for example. What are aliens going to do with a Frisbee? Who knows, maybe eat off of it or worship it. It doesn’t matter because what they won’t do is use it for its purpose: to throw in the air.

That’s what women are like with phones. Endless using, no purpose. [Read more]

Men are much better than women at camping. In fact, women are so bad at it, that there’s almost nothing as unpleasant as camping with a woman.

Except maybe one thing.

Camping with two women. [Read more]

Unlike women, men can be a whole shit load of things over the course of their lives — and all without relying on government quotas or miniskirts. To men that’s an important difference.

We can accelerate in academia for one, we can also become top businessmen in sharp looking suits, or we can simply be good parents. That’s our prerogative as men: whatever we want and however we want to do it.

However, while exercising so much responsibility, we men, from time to time, can also be wrong.

Not in the way that women are wrong, of course. The way a man can be wrong is like placing the fork and knife on the wrong side of the plate. Who cares, everyone still eats. The way that women are usually wrong is by throwing the flatware in the pool, burning dinner, and then playing the period card like its Uno.

Uno! Great. As if women have ever had more than one card. [Read more]

Bobby Riggs was a man of class, honor and integrity; and he was also a fine athlete of tennis. Ranked as the best tennis player in the world at the age of 21, Riggs would go on to win consecutive singles championships in the 40’s, was inducted into the Tennis Hall of Fame in 1951 and became a household name just like Tiger Woods. He later dedicated a large part of his life to education — education about cancer, tennis, and education about men being better than women.

“Any half-decent male player could defeat even the best female players.”

That is a quote from Bobby Riggs in 1973. It was true then. It’s true today. It doesn’t even have to be about tennis. [Read more]