There was a time when lawyers were not hated like vermin. Do you know what happened between then and now? Women joined the practice of law.

It’s completely true. Check your history books.

In 1970, women made up 10% of first-year law students. I suppose those were the “lesbians” of the day. Interestingly enough, lawyers weren’t hated in the 70’s. Remember Night Court? That show was full of lawyers and everyone loved it.

Today, women have bumble-fucked their way into 52 to 90% of law students and Guess what, everyone fucking hates lawyers. [Read more]

Not all men have money, good looks, talent, wit, charm, charisma, interesting stories, cultural insight, skills, athletic abilities, woman-attracting macho attitudes, an ability to eat an inhuman amount of food (or food based, non-toxic products), a sense of style, an easy going demeanor, a non-threatening posture, rich parents, or an in depth knowledge of anything and a desire to show it off. All men, however, are still men. That means they need to get laid.

So how do these men attract women? I’ll tell you how, by taking charge where women have failed for the last thirty years.

Manginas are my hero. [Read more]

Some people will tell you that women played a minor role in history. They’re wrong.

Women played no role in history. Zip, zero, zilch, nada, and fuck all. If you add them all up they equal women’s contribution to history: absolutely fucking nothing.

I was listening to a Wild-Eyed Crazy talk about the early domestication of dogs in a documentary. I’m a man so I enjoy that kind of shit. Why a woman was on a documentary that wasn’t also a sex documentary and also didn’t put her in a bikini, I do not know. However, this wacky broad posed a non-interesting theory:

The early domestication of dogs required extreme empathy. Thus, women did it.

Wow. That’s a doozy. [Read more]

Having one leg and being a tremendous bitch have nothing to do with one another in the case of Heather Mills ex-McCartney. Or perhaps they do. I’m unfamiliar with the circumstances that led to the loss of her leg so I can’t be sure.

You see, as a man I have a natural revulsion to celebrity drama-news — something I shall start calling drews because it’s an amalgamation of the two words ‘drama’ and ‘news’ and it sounds completely pointless and stupid. I hate drews like I hate the plague.

Wait, I know how losing a leg and being a bitch could go hand in hand. Perhaps Heather Mills was at a sob-fest for endangered bears and accidentally used a honey-based body moisturizing cream that she stole from one of her hippie friends just an hour before. Every idiot knows bears love honey. [Read more]

Recently, I was buying some shirts, socks, and various sundries at a retail store. Of course something like this is always a major disaster for a man because at some point, there’s a good chance you’re going to have to deal with a woman.

Maybe a woman will be sitting in an aisle of the parking lot, completely blocking traffic, while waiting for another woman to load six carts of crap and two poorly behaving children into her SUV. Maybe some female-type will be asking you to register to vote or sign some dumb fuck petition for saving an animal she secretly wants to fuck.

Or maybe she’ll just be the damn cashier. In this case, she was the damn cashier. [Read more]

This is going to be one of my most controversial articles to date. I say that because I don’t even agree with it. In fact I’m disgusted by it; but that’s the burden of being a man. Even if you don’t agree with the truth or if you’re disgusted by the big fat obligation you have to keep shucking out the dough for, you do it. You do it and you shut your mouth.

Or in some cases you open your mouth in order to speak the truth. And then sometimes your mouth is a metaphor for fingers, which can do writing unless your hands are cuffed behind your back for some reason. In that case, the mouth can still be just a mouth. You understand. [Read more]

Here’s an interesting scientific thought experiment for you.

Everyone knows that women belong at home and not in the workplace. Just like everyone knows that men are responsible for being the providers in the family unit. That’s why lesbianism doesn’t work and doesn’t exist. It’s like having a car with no steering wheel and a 2 hp engine.

That’s called bumper cars. They sound fun, but really they’re just a waste of your fucking time. [Read more]

Prison is not a nice place. That’s why I would think women love it in there. They always suspect that everyone’s out to screw them anyway. Their mindset is perfect for the Big House. Plus women are annoying.

But why was I not surprised to hear about Oprah v2.0 hawking horseshit about how unfair it is for women to be in prison on television

To regain the thousand Man Points I just lost by implying that I watch or have ever watched either the Oprah show or the Tyra Banks show, let me clarify:

I have never fucking watched either The Oprah Show or The Tyra Banks show. [Read more]