No Women Allowed


Dick Masterson here and welcome to MenareBetterthanWomen.com.

If this is your first time, how about stopping by the the About page to get the hang of things before diving full tilt into the mix -- or how about not because as a man you already know exactly what you're doing.

Ladies as always, this site is totally off limits.

Updates:
    04/25/08 - Dick Masterson will appear in a special two-hour segment of the Allan Handelman show this Tuesday, April 29th from 5-7PM EST. If you're in the DC area, tune into 101.1 WZTK. Otherwise, listen online at 106.1 or 103 FM.
News archive

Watch Out Pedestrians! It’s Danica Patrick!

Posted in World News on May 16th, 2008

“Hi. Um, you know, it’s really, really unfortunate what happened today. Thoughts and prayers are with him, with his family and hopefully he can get back on the track soon and be able to do what he loves. Thank you.” - Danica Patrick

What the man in question “loves” is not getting hit by race cars — specially race cars driven by professional cocktease and race car driver Danica Patrick.

Last week, Danica Patrick proved once and for all that women do belong in professional car racing. They belong in the winner’s circle in a bikini, blasting cheap champagne all over celebrating men with awesome mustaches.

Women do not belong in the drivers seat. Women never belong in the driver’s seat. [Read more]

Feminism Is A Business

Posted in The MANifesto on May 12th, 2008

Feminism is the idea that women should be treated like children.

Didn’t accomplish anything this time around, sweetheart? That’s okay. Give it another shot after we bend the fuck out of the rules.

Scratch that. Feminism is the idea that women should be treated like spoiled children — who get do-overs and freebies until they’re chucking batteries at homeless people out the sunroof of their father’s BMW.

Well-raised kids get stuck with Dick Soup if that’s what they ordered. Do-overs are not a part of man-parenting. Do-overs are for ladies. [Read more]

TMZ Agrees With Me. Why Don’t You?

Posted in Anecdotal Evidence on May 7th, 2008

If you thought about that question, you’re a woman. Fuck off my website.

Below is a short segment of the television show TMZ covering my appearance on Dr. Phil. Yes, TMZ calls me a “douche”. Yes, TMZ calls me an “actor”. But watch this clip “between the lines” and you’ll discover something mancredible.

TMZ agrees with me.

[Read more]

Size Matters

Posted in Science Says... on May 5th, 2008

Which of these assholes would you hire to run your company?

I’m going to explain why you chose the one you did because I like explaining obvious shit in a humorous way. That’s why I wrote Men Are Better Than Women — on sale now.

What could be more obvious than men are better than women? Look at the size of our fucking heads! [Read more]

Dick’s Voicemail #9

Posted in Dick In Your Ear on May 1st, 2008

Remember to pick up your signed copy of Men Are Better Than Women at OprahisGoingtoShit.com. Each signed book comes with a limited edition 8×10 of yours truly.


[Read more]

Dick’s Voicemail #8

Posted in Dick In Your Ear on April 28th, 2008

[Read more]

Happy Birthday. I Got You A ‘Settle the Fuck Down’.

Posted in Honorary Man of the Month, Science Says... on April 27th, 2008

Women are the only creatures on the planet dumb enough to think their birthday is an actual holiday. Birthdays are not holidays. Just like weddings, coffee, pets, and anniversaries that don’t end in and also are “0″; birthdays are not a big deal.

A woman once told me that I had to be nicer to her because it was her “birthday week.” Are you fucking kidding me?

Men are better than women at having birthdays. Men are so much better than women at birthdays that I don’t even know when my birthday is. [Read more]

Dick’s Voicemail #7

Posted in Dick In Your Ear on April 24th, 2008

Men, thanks for the calls. Women, stop calling me. [Read more]


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